By choice, I do not watch a lot of television. I find it often clutters my mind and distracts me from my priorities. Occasionally, though, I will indulge in one of America's favorite pastimes for the heck of it. Recently, I have found myself watching NBC's new series Parenthood. I would not have considered watching the show if my sister-in-law hadn't sent me a link about it. By looking at the pictures of the cast I would never have guessed that one of the characters is diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome.
I find it very odd to watch a show about something very real in my life. I have never related to a show's subject more and was struck by the mixed emotions I felt while watching it. On the one hand, I couldn't help but make comparisons of the characters' lives and ours, of the child with autism and my son, of the parents and my husband and I. There were times I was nauseated by the Hollywood sterility of the show (for instance, the house is clean, the parents look great, the kids don't have boogers in their noses). Other times, I was in tears when I related to what the characters were experiencing such as when the parents begin to understand their son may have autism and may have a problem.
The fact that a character is openly depicted as having autism is incredibly important and beneficial for the autism community as it helps to educate the public about the condition. For that reason alone, I will continue to watch the show in support of it. I try to avoid judging the accuracy of the depiction of autism for the simple reason that autism varies quite a lot between individuals. My own personal experience with autism is not broad enough for me to make generalizations about how it should be portrayed. There were times when I watched the episodes that I couldn't relate to the autistic character, Max, at all but then there were scenes in the show that were similar to experiences we have had with our son.
One scene to which I could relate was when Max became frustrated when he was cutting out shapes with his scissors. As he continues to get frustrated, his classmates begin to tease him which eventually leads to his attacking and biting a fellow student. What may appear to be an explosive response to being taunted is actually precipitated by his being frustrated with his imperfect ability to use his scissors. For quite a long time, my son frequently attacked his fellow students, often biting them. One such attack was precipitated by a student's insistence that our dog, Patch, was actually a cow because she is black and white. The child was teasing but my son didn't understand that, plus my son is incredibly literal and he was unable to deal with the child calling his dog a cow because it was inaccurate. In this particular incident, my son grabbed a chair and threw it at the other student. Obviously, my son's aggression was incredibly frustrating for all of us. The teachers eventually learned what triggered his attacks and worked to avoided those situations which led to his explosive responses.
Perhaps watching a show that depicts a family struggling with similar issues may give us another way to process our own lives from a different perspective. I'm sure that there will be plenty of things about which I won't be able to relate but maybe the show will broaden my ideas about being a family affected by autism and to see ourselves as we may be seen by those on the outside. I would recommend those interested in understanding Asperger's Syndrome to watch the show but to keep in mind that the show is limited because it is, by its very nature, unreal.
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