They will sing to us

I'm going to shuck off the negativity.  I'm going to throw it to the floor and stomp on it, laughing as I shatter the negative feelings that have sapped me of my energy.  I'm going to dance . . . at least until I crumble again which will happen no matter how hard I try.  Until then, I'm shifting my focus from the problems to the possibilities, from the bad to the good.

Tonight, I just finished reading an uplifting book by a fellow resident of Utah, Kristi Lyn Stewart.  Her book titled, Dancing with Autism: Choosing Joy over Fear, is an honest, personal assessment of her experiences with raising an autistic child.  Throughout the book, she describes her own experiences and provides suggestions on how to embrace autism and to accept it for what it is.  From "tossing out the guilt" (the first chapter), "living with embarrassment, to "take what's yours," she details many of the aspects of raising a child with autism and offers ways to search for the positive throughout each experience.  "The quote printed at the beginning of the book, sums up her philosophy quite well:

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about dancing in the rain."

Well said.  When I first purchased the book, I was concerned that the book would present a sugar-coated version of raising a child with autism.  I should have known better because even Pollyanna would have a hard time embracing all of autism's attributes.  Although I admit that I may not be as optimistic as Stewart presents herself, I applaud her for her strength and her motivation to write such an encouraging book.

When reading a book by a fellow parent of an autistic child, I find it hard to not try to look for our similarities and our differences, to compare our situations, our children.  With a few exceptions, our children are quite different.  Her son is not has high functioning as my son, so the challenges she has faced and is currently facing are greater than those we face.    Despite that, though, I found that she expresses many of the emotions I have experienced.  Occasionally, she references specific things her son has done that mine has done as well (such as having a negative reaction to the sound of presents being opened - the rustling of the paper) that I can identify to certain experiences she has had.  Mostly, I identify with her philosophy and I appreciate her humility.  I particularly appreciated her last chapter titled, "Taking What's Yours."  In it, she states quite honorably in my opinion to ". . . take those ideas in this book that feel right to you.  If something doesn't site quite right with you it is probably because your own path will require something different."  I value an author (and a fellow parent of an autistic child) who appreciates that our children are different despite their having autism and that we must find what works for our own children.  I agree wholeheartedly with her philosophy that:

"We need to let the good that is waiting for us come in.  We won't have to yank it in or try and widen our doors to let it through.  The things that will help us most in raising our children with autism are the things that feel like putting on a warm blanket or settling down to listen to our favorite song.  They will sing to us, they will fit into the next logical step we need to take, and they will bring with it the feeling that we are on the right path."

I personally found her book to be like a nice, warm blanket.  I found it comforting and empowering.  I believe that this book would be helpful to those who feel isolated and alone, who feel confused and overwhelmed, those needing a little inspiration.  She empowers the reader to realize that there is beauty in autism and that every day we have a choice to chose joy over fear.  Reading her book is like getting a nice warm hug from someone who understands, and we all know how powerful a really warm hug can be.